Over my cold dead body, etc etc etc

Paul McCartney wants us to stop eating steak. Here’s Bloomberg:

Paul McCartney, the former Beatle and vegetarian pop star, asked fans to go meatless on Mondays to help slow global warming by reducing the amount of gaseous emissions from farm animals.

Maybe this is all an elaborate fart joke?

“If you want to fight climate change, it’s not only about electricity and coal-fired power plants: Agriculture is a huge contributor too and meat consumption is a big problem,” Jan van Aken, a biologist and agriculture campaigner for the Greenpeace environmental group, said today in a telephone interview from Hamburg. It’s “mainly burps” and animal flatulence, he said.

I’m seeing a problem with this. If we stop eating meat for one day a week, won’t that mean that there’ll be one-sixth more cows out there mooing and farting and burping and generally being enviro-vandals, instead of lying motionless on our dinner plates with a nice red wine sauce?

Instead, we should be eating more steak. Go on, stinky hippies, it’s your duty to the planet. Head straight down to your local butcher and order a nice, juicy tenderloin or rib-eye, or a big ol’ slab of chuck or brisket for a nice beef stew.

Every cow in the fields is an environmental time bomb, even worse than a big gas-guzzling car. Only you can stop this environmental menace.

(This message was brought to you by PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals.)