February 8, 2010

Iqaluit (bless you)

The G7 finance ministers met over the weekend in Iqaluit (bless you), and if you're wondering "where the hell is Iqaluit?" (bless you) you're not alone; it's a little town of 6,500 people on the southern end of Canada's Baffin Island, up north of Hudson Bay.

The average temperature in Iqaluit (bless you) in February ranges from a high of -23C to a low of -32C; the all-time record high for February is a balmy 4 degrees Celsius. I have to ask: what the hell were they doing up there? Was someone expecting a ski junket or something?

The meeting basically amounted to Eurozone finmins explaining that no, they're not all going into a gigantic default spiral, and that it's all going to be okay really truly they just need a couple billion euros to tide them over to payday. More interesting than anything that came out of the summit: residents of Iqaluit (...oh, forget it) are known as Iqalummiut, which sounds like the aftermath of a night eating the local Inuit delicacies of walrus meat and seal blood.

February 7, 2010

JRE Keeps You Entertained All Weekend: Punching through the ice ceiling

The Vancouver Winter Olympics kick off on Friday night - a quadrennial celebration of skiing, skating, bobsledding, and basically every other sport that Australia's bad at. (And what the hell is with curling (previously on JRE)? That's not a sport, that's competitive cleaning.)

So to keep all the Aussie readers cheerful throughout the upcoming medal drought, here's Australia's Own Steven Bradbury winning gold, gold, gold at Salt Lake City in 2002.

Update: Bonus awesomeness - Alisa Camplin's gold-medal-winning final jump in the 2002 aerials final.

Update 2: Oh, hey, Bikini Curling.

February 5, 2010

You'll never need to leave the house again

Old and busted: home-delivered McDonalds.

New hotness: home-delivered yum cha.

The only problem: they want one day advance notice and a $70(!) minimum order. What am I supposed to do if I get sudden midnight cravings for shu mai and sticky rice?

February 4, 2010

Australians all let us rejoice

An island off the Aussie coast has captured the record for the highest wind speed ever recorded (253mph, in the eye of a tropical cyclone).

The old record holder - the Mount Washington Observatory in New Hampshire - has a hilarious FAQ about the new record. Sample question: "the new record occurred during a typhoon, does that REALLY count?". (Quick, someone call the waaaahmbulance!)

February 2, 2010

He forgot "a hive of scum and villainy"

South Australia's Attorney-General (the same clown who's single-handedly stopping an R-18 rating for videogames in Australia) has picked a fight with News Corp's AdelaideNow website, after News sharply criticised new laws requiring any political speech about South Australia on the intertubes to be accompanied by a real name and postcode...

Attorney-General Michael Atkinson denied that the new law was an attack on free speech. "The AdelaideNow website is not just a sewer of criminal defamation, it is a sewer of identity theft and fraud," Mr Atkinson said. "There is no impinging on freedom of speech, people are free to say what they wish as themselves, not as somebody else."

Mr Atkinson also said he expected The Advertiser to target him for sponsoring the law. "I am also certain that Advertiser Newspapers and News Limited will punish me personally, viciously for being the attorney-general responsible for this law," he said. "You will publish false stories about me, invent things about me to punish me."

He's not crazy; the voices in his head have told him he's completely sane!

The most excellent pot-stirrers at Crikey have something to say on the topic in today's leader (subscription only):

These are the rantings and ravings of an unstitched politician whose extreme paranoia presents his own status, as SA's first law officer, and his government's status, as a tired administration riddled with controversy, in a terrible light. Less than two months out from an election, he sounds like a man in severe defence mode in need of counselling and possibly medication.

We await the Attorney's writ for defamation. We have our lunch packed.

Previously on JRE: are there any Aussie state politicians who aren't nuts? You, you, you, you, don't you worry about that.

February 1, 2010

Oh yeah?... well, your mom is economically valueless!

FSA head Adair Turner, England's chief financial services regulator, thinks carry trades are "economically valueless".  

It seems that the head of the FSA doesn't know how his industry works. Banks' business models fundamentally rely on borrowing short and lending long; is that not a gigantic carry trade?

January 31, 2010

It could be worse, I could be a tax accountant

(Ed note: this has been in my post queue for months; it's a bit out of date, but might as well hit "post" on it.)

So the dope-smoking tree-hugging penguin-shagging rainbow-huffing commie pinko hippies at the New Economic Foundation got together and put out a report. Aww, how cute - they think they're a real think-tank!

But they haven't quite got the "academic rigor" thing down. Here's a snip from their "General note on Methods"...

This research has been inspired by a methodology that was developed to account for value, called Social Return on Investment (SROI). The case studies presented in this report did not involve full SROI analyses of the jobs featured. Instead they were informed by SROI techniques and principles.

"We picked and chose whatever techniques would give us the answer we wanted."

We only included things that were material. These analyses are partial, and we were not aiming for exact findings. However, we are confident that we have included the most material outcomes.

"We picked and chose whatever data gave us the answers we wanted."

And you can probably guess what their conclusions were. Of course they have to take a swing at the banksters:

High-earning investment bankers in the City of London are among the best remunerated people in the economy. But the earnings they command and the profits they make come at a huge cost because of the damaging social effects of the City of London’s financial activities. While collecting salaries of between £500,000 and £10 million, leading City bankers to destroy £7 of social value for every pound in value they generate.

Do they mean M&A bankers? Private bankers? Relationship managers? What about FX traders? Structurers? Cash equity market-makers? Or is it more convenient to lump them all together and blame the "bankers"?

Yeah, I thought so.

Although the role of an advertising executive has high status, the impact of the industry has always been a point of controversy. [...] For a salary of between £50,000 and £12 million, top advertising executives destroy £11 of value for every pound in value they generate.

The rich kid becomes a junkie, the poor kid an advertiser;
What a tragic waste of potential! (Being a junkie's not so good either.)

Determining the right amount of tax payable is a specialist skill and often requires professional support. However, some highly paid tax accountants’ sole purpose is to help rich individuals and companies to pay less tax. [...] For a salary of between £75,000 and £200,000 tax accountants destroy £47 of value for every pound in value they generate.

So as soon as you start helping people pay less than the default rate of tax, you're an evil scum-sucker. Does this mean tax accountants should have a duty to make their clients pay more tax than the law requires?

Hospital cleaners play a vital role in the workings of our healthcare facilities. [...] We estimated, however, that for every £1 they are paid, over £10 in social value is generated.

Waste recycling workers do a range of different jobs that relate to processing and preventing waste and promoting recycling. [...] Our model projects that for every £1 of value spent on wages, £12 of value will be generated.

GREEEG, THE STOP SIGN; GREEEEG, THE STOP SIGN... sorry, what?

Okay, look, I totally agree with their conclusions about childcare workers, hospital cleaners, and recycling workers. But are there any high-paid jobs that these clowns do approve of?

Oh, wait, I can think of one...

Think-tank researchers promote innovative solutions that challenge mainstream thinking on economic, environment and social issues. Our model projects that for every £1 spent on buying fair-trade marijuana and organic decaf skinny soy vanilla-hazelnut frappuccinos (with extra decaf) for lefty think-tank types, £69 of value is generated - so give us more money.

January 30, 2010

You wish you were here

From Pictory, via the arbiters of cool at Coudal Partners: a photographic showcase of San Francisco.

Worth the click just for the photo of the USS Nimitz cruising through Golden Gate.

January 29, 2010

Moon Over Singapore


Moon Over Singapore, originally uploaded by Shiny Things.

Canon 7D + 300mm f/2.8 IS + full moon = this. Here's the even bigger version.

Hey Neil and Buzz, wave to the camera.

January 28, 2010

Or else you'll do what?

"Don't cast protest vote, says [Lee Kuan Yew]". "Pretty please," he didn't need to add. Quoth the big man himself, from today's Pravda:

The current contentious issue on the affordability of public housing was given another airing by Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew who cautioned Singaporeans not to cast a protest vote against the ruling party over this.

Making fun of the ST's editing is like shooting fish in a barrel, but I can't resist: that should be "current contentious issue OF the affordability of blah blah blah".

And yeah, ordering (begging?) your electorate not to cast a protest vote is a dead giveaway that you're not campaigning from a position of strength.

As Singaporeans lament rising flat prices, he said they ought to understand that the Government sells them at a subsidised price, below market rate, so that they can own an asset that will appreciate in value over the years.

It adds to their wealth and this is an asset-enhancing policy Mr Lee believes citizens should not find fault with.

If they do, they must be 'daft', he said, at a dialogue during a housing conference as part of a series of events to mark the Housing and Development Board's 50th anniversary.

What the Great Leader doesn't mention is that HDB flats are a wealth trap. The HDB's rules prohibit borrowing against an apartment except for reverse mortgages, so the only way to realise the gain in your apartment's value is to sell the place and go back to renting.

With Singaporean house prices as crazy as they are right now - the going rate is somewhere north of 30 times annual rent - that might not be such a bad idea.

And if National Development Minister Mah Bow Tan is unable to defend this policy, 'he deserves to lose' at the next general election, he quipped, to laughter from the participants, including a chuckling Mr Mah.

You say "quip", I say "veiled threat". Po-tay-to, po-tah-to.

But if Mr Mah loses to the opposition, he warned that Singaporeans better sell their flats fast as they would no longer be of any value.

This is priceless: "vote for us or your most valuable asset will be ripped out from under your feet and the sky will fall down." The PAP must be pretty bereft of policies if they're resorting to scaring the electorate into line.

Related: Minister Tan has announced that he'll be looking into the skyrocketing prices of HDB flats.

Amid concerns that speculation could have pushed resale flat rices up, he said the HDB is reviewing its rules and policies to 'see if there're any rules that are encouraging or allowing people to speculate on HDB flats'

He should be looking at the MAS's policies instead. That enormous asset bubble might have something to do with Singapore's rock-bottom interest rates, imported from the USA via Singapore's currency peg.

January 26, 2010

BREAKING APPLE NEWS

With the most anticipated tablet since the Ten Commandments only hours away from being unveiled, every website in the world is moving to all-Apple-all-the-time news. And JRE is jumping on the bandwagon.

TODAY IN APPLE NEWS:

Apple Computer announced yesterday that it sold 8.7 million iPhones in Q4, revealed quarterly earnings of $3.67 per share (up 50% on last year), and His Steveness hinted that "there's a major new product coming out that we're really excited about". Whatever could he be talking about?...

An apple tree near Exeter, in snow-covered England, has produced apples in January for the second year in a row...

Real estate looks shakier than ever in the Big Apple, after Tishman Speyer and Blackrock handed the Stuy Town/Peter Cooper Village development back to its creditors. The investors paid $5.4 billion for the complex back in 2007, but in less than three years the value of the buildings has dropped to $1.8 billion...

Hong Kong's Apple Daily newspaper reports that 港股再瀉 489點; 內銀當災工行插 3%...

The former US manager of Apple Records will appear with Beatles cover band Creme Tangerine (not Creme Apple?) to celebrate Beatles Day this Friday at Seattle's Pike Place Market...

Singer-songwriter Fiona Apple has launched a lawsuit against a Nashville karaoke bar for playing her music without paying royalties...

And Gwyneth Paltrow - whose daughter's name is Apple - has been dinged by Sense About Science for mindless advocacy of pesticide-free foods.

"When I read about what pesticides do to small animals, I thought, why would I expose my child to that?" she told Good Housekeeping magazine.

Both scientist Dr. John Cherrie of the Institute of Occupational Medicine in Edinburgh and Professor Alan Boobis, a toxicologist at the Imperial College London said Paltrow was missing the point. "It's the dose that makes the poison," said Cherrie. "Experimental animals," added Boobis, "are exposed to doses substantially greater than those to which consumers will ever be exposed."

January 25, 2010

Also better than Pravda

Pages in this month's issue of Bloomberg Markets: 170-ish

Pages torn out because they had an interesting article about Bloomberg's local vol model: 2

Pages torn out because I was supergluing my Mac's power plug and needed some scrap paper: 2

Pages lobbed into the trash: 166-ish

Bloomberg's journalism is second to none, especially their investigative pieces (this article predicted the money-market fund implosion a year before it happened). But their magazine articles - "The Richest Hedge Funds"; "Goldman's Subsidised Risks"; "Car Crazy in China" - read like a list of "Stuff That We Ran On The Newswire Two Weeks Ago".

(And while we're talking about Bloomberg: can someone please teach their subeditors how to write coherent headlines? Doll in Sync With Biggs Queries Roubini Exit Strategy isn't a headline, it's the plot of a bad movie about a ventriloquist.)

January 24, 2010

The Albury Vegetarians Association denies involvement

An alert reader tipped me off to this strange pair of articles in my hometown paper (it's better than Pravda!). It's not been a good week for Albury burger joints...

On Friday: Burger bug: eatery closes as salmonella cases flood health service; an Albury burger bar has been linked to over 100 cases of salmonellosis, thought to have been caused by a dodgy batch of garlic aioli.

And yesterday: Albury's Hungry Jack's burns; the Albury outpost of Hungry Jack's (Burger King to seppo readers) has burned to the ground (with pics!). But it could've been worse: "customers praised the quick actions of staff who worked to get everyone out of the restaurant and made sure no one was injured".

In other news, the Vegetarian Threat Level has been raised from Medium-Rare (low or general risk of vegetarian attacks) to Well-Done (severe and immediate threat of tofu).

January 22, 2010

Paul Ehrlich sues for copyright infringement

Food shortages are coming soon, so buy commodities, says Jim Rogers.

Does Captain Bow-Tie ever let up on his "buy commodities" schtick? Sheesh.

January 21, 2010

Mahathir: 9/11 truther!

Former Malaysian Prime Minister Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad doesn't know when to shut up.

Yesterday, he stood up in front of the General Conference for the Support of Al-Quds to Aid the Palestinians and launched into a Hugo-Chavez-grade crazy rant. AsiaOne reports:

There is strong evidence that the Sept 11 attacks on the United States that killed nearly 3,000 could have been 'staged' as an excuse to mount attacks on the Muslim world, said Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad.

'I am not sure now that Muslim terrorists carried out these attacks. There is evidence that the attacks were staged.

'If they can make Avatar, they can make anything,' the former prime minister told a press conference here yesterday after delivering his speech at the General Conference for the Support of Al-Quds to aid the Palestinians.

He said killing innocent people to provide an excuse for war was not new to the US.

I bet he also thinks the moon landings were faked. Oh, and this is charming:

'[President Obama] promised to close down Guantanamo but he has not closed down Guantanamo.

'It is quite easy to promise during election time but you know there are forces in the United States which prevent the President from doing some things. One of the forces is the Jewish lobby, AIPAC,' he said.

This report has also been doing the rounds - I've never heard of the Malaysian Insider before, but they're reporting that Mahathir went even further than what I printed above.

Can we all agree that the guy's a raving nutcase who should never have been elected?

(Side note: Mahathir is also the guy who pissed away $250 million of Malaysia's money in a failed attempt to corner the tin market back in 1981.)

Email Josh

josh, at josh-dot-sg

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